Over the last several weeks my life has been pretty crazy and hectic. You see, we are getting ready to move. For the most part, I’m pretty used to moving. It’s something I’ve done a few times and and I’ve made a few cross country moves so I understand what has to be done.
During all the moves of my past I’ve done them as a single person. So, as a single guy you might have guessed that I really didn’t always have a bunch of stuff to move and for the most part the moves went pretty smoothly.
This time around though I’m married and even though we’ve been married for just over 2 years my wife has lived in our present house for almost 15 years. 15 years is a long time to be in one spot. You can accumulate a lot of stuff. Her children grew up here. A lot of memories are here. Our 2 car garage could only fit 1 car in it.
So, the kids are grown and out of the house. We’re downsizing. We’re going from 4 bedrooms, 2 baths and an office to a historic home built in 1893 with 2 bedrooms and 1 bath…and about half the Sq. footage. Needless to say…we’re purging…Big Time!
I find it interesting that life’s occurrences often bring up lessons that we need to be reminded about right when we need to be reminded.
This move has been a Big reminder for me and also for my wife Terri of an important lesson. Are you hanging on to your personal history? Are you clinging to the past?
Many people get hung up in being a victim of their personal history. They hang on to past pains, abuses, and short comings and use them as their “calling card” to tell others about their “poor me” status in life. They use this as an excuse in their life. “Things aren’t the way they used to be.” “Whatever happened to the good old days?” “I was abandoned as a child”. “My parents were divorced and I’ve never gotten over it.” The list could go on for several pages.
Our personal history…our baggage makes up who we really are. You’ve probably heard the saying that they’re no coincidences in life. Everything happens for a purpose. The truth be told, all the things that have happened in your life have happened for a reason. Embrace your personal history. Embrace yourself. Come to accept your past. And finally…
Let It Go!!
Letting go of the past allows you to move forward. To start fresh. To begin a new journey. Bringing the past with you into this moment only offers to slow you down and burden you with unnecessary weight.
Is this easy? Not always. If you’re like me it’s not a do it once type of thing. I have to be reminded from time to time to just let go.
This move has served as my reminder. A major move can be very stressful. There’s a lot to do. Decisions have to be made about what to keep and what to let go. Emotions can play a big part in all of this.
Has it been easy for us? We’ve had our moments… It’s been a little easier for me…I don’t have 15 years of memories to go through. However, Terri has been a champion through all this.
The good thing is, we’re looking at this as a new beginning. A fresh start. An opportunity to create more of our life together. To write more of our story. We have embraced this move and we are very excited for what lies ahead. Terri is like a little kid…filled with anticipation and excitement. One of the first comments she made when we first saw this house was ” I can’t wait to decorate for Christmas!”
I just got a call from her and she’s found some really cute, funky fabric to reupholster the chairs for the kitchen table. She’s letting go of the old and bringing in new…not to mention the old just wouldn’t look good in the new kitchen.
Find the lessons in your life that remind you it’s time to let go of the past. Embrace who you are, embrace your history. But please, don’t drag it with you along the way.
I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments about how you’ve done with letting go of the past. Please leave them below. I’d also appreciate it if you’d share this with your friends and followers on Facebook and Twitter if you found value in it.
Until next time…Go out and Live Your Best Life.
Oh my friend, can I relate to this post. My family has had a lake home for 20 years, and since my parents found their new home far from the midwest where they are retiring, it is very likely being sold after this summer. LOTS of emotions….to be honest that I’m not ready to let go of! So while I hear you, and know how important these steps are for our growth, I’m just not ready to hear it!
I do love that Terri found some cute, funky fabric to reupholster the chairs with!
Happy moving!
.-= Beth Allen´s last blog ..Successful Weight Loss & Long Term Weight Management =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 8th, 2010 at 8:14 pm
Beth,
I’m glad you can relate to the emotional experience this can be. It sounds like you’ll be having one for yourself soon. Hopefully, you’ll have the chance to go back for one more visit. I remember how nice some of those lake homes can be. I’m sure you will have plenty of fond memories.
[Reply]
This is so important. I love that you are working with closing one chapter of your life and excited about writing the next chapter. “The only thing that is constant in life, is change”
Not letting go stops us from growing and learning. This is great advice and I wish you well on your move.
Many blessing for your future!
.-= Jose H. Caraballo´s last blog ..Forget Your Why…Begin With Your Purpose! =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 8th, 2010 at 8:17 pm
Thanks Jose,
It’s a good thing you’re in Miami and way over on the other coast otherwise we’d be recruiting you to help move
Looking forward to new adventures is always fun and with life constantly changing there’s always a new adventure in store.
[Reply]
Thanks Kimberly,
Here’s another analogy for you. It’s hard to move forward if you’re keeping one foot in the grave.
I appreciate your thoughts.
[Reply]
I can also relate to this Don,
I have moved house 10 times during my married life it is an exciting time but can be very stressful as well, but great advice about letting things go.
.-= jean´s last blog ..What is your ‘Passion’? =-.
[Reply]
Don,
What a wonderful analogy, moving is a wonderful time to declutter the home and the soul at the same time. I have to admit that, whilst I am a true believer in the ‘everything happens for a reason’ school of thought and I dont hold onto the past too much. I have a hell of a lot of clutter lol!
I am not sure if you are familiar with the TV show friends. But there is a great episode where the normally perfectly tidy Monica is mortified that her boyfriend Chandler is about to discover the ‘secret messy cupboard.’
I have a cupboard and probably about three drawyers in my kitchen that serve no purpose other than storing clutter from the past.
Thank you for the reminder that it’s not just the garden that needs a tidy but the house needs a spring clean too.
Beth
.-= Beth Hewitt´s last blog ..Pruning your Life =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 9th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
Hi Beth,
Yes we are fans of Friends and Terri and I remember that episode. It was a great one. I’ll have to make sure and not let the mysterious “junk drawer” appear in our new home.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
[Reply]
Oh can I relate to this! It’s so easy to get caught up in carrying around the “stuff” from your past, whether it be emotional or physical.
My brother always reminds me by saying, “Are you being like Mom again?” Darn him! But he is correct. How does it serve you now!
Thanks Don,
Val
.-= Val Wilcox´s last blog ..The Power of YOU! =-.
[Reply]
It is so true. It can be very stressful to throw out old things that we attachment to. Sometimes we collect things and have no idea why we ever had it in the first place.
Even though the process is hard, it also is very liberating once completed. Clearing out physical clutter can clear out the mind clutter.
I know that I’m still holding onto past experiences and momentos that need to be left in the past. Thanks for the reminder
.-= Nick Logan´s last undefined ..If you register your site for free at =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 9th, 2010 at 4:45 pm
Nick,
Funny you should mention finding stuff and having no idea where it came from or what it’s for. I think that’s happened a few times for me already.
I guess clearing clutter and letting go of the past is an ongoing process.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.
[Reply]
Now that I have actually stood inside the “1 car garage” I think we’ll be letting go of a LOT more!
There is NO WAY the mini cooper will fit in there!
I have to add my two cents . . . this has been an incredibly emotional, but VERY freeing experience. We have sold a lot, we have donated more, and I feel somehow lighter, in my heart.
I know this is the right path for us and am REALLY looking forward to the next chapter in this INCREDIBLE journey!
Terri
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 9th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Yes, the purging will continue for awhile after we move as we sort through the things we weren’t sure of keeping to use or not.
I’m excited to be taking this walk with you on this new path in our life. thanks for sharing your .02 cents.
[Reply]
What an exciting time, even if there is a little bit of stress, and a whole lot of work that comes with it. It is so great that Terri is handling it well and seems to have the right attitude!
I hope that the move goes well and look forward to seeing some pictures, and maybe videos, of the new house!
.-= Melissa Wright´s last blog ..How to start a Blog (part 2) =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 9th, 2010 at 4:39 pm
What?…Video? LOL I have to find where the camera got packed away at before I can even think of that. Just trying to find the time to get this post in was a stretch
[Reply]
Don, Like so many others who have already commented here, I can relate to this! My garage is full of boxes of “my past” and they just sit there. Why? I often ask myself…then I get busy and do nothing about it.
Purging our pasts is necessary in order to move into our futures. Thanks for sharing your own journey and reminding us to just let go so our present can be that much more rewarding!
~Mary Lou
.-= Mary Lou Kayser´s last blog ..Why Saying Thank You Will Increase the Value of Your Personal Brand 100-Fold =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 9th, 2010 at 4:40 pm
It’s beginning to sound like I’ll have to another post down the road to update everyone on the progress.
Thanks Mary Lou for stopping by and sharing your thoughts.
[Reply]
Good advice – something a lot of us could learn from including me. It is so exciting to have a new adventure to look forward too.
.-= Glyna Humm´s last blog ..Internet Marketing and Social Networking – A Match Made in Cyber Space Heaven =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 9th, 2010 at 4:42 pm
Glyna,
It is an adventure and yes we are really looking forward to it. It’s almost like a new start in life.
Thanks!
[Reply]
Thanks Dee,
I appreciate you stopping by and leaving a comment. Thanks for the well wishes in our new home. We are so looking forward to this new step.
[Reply]
Don,
Moving! Wow…what fun. I immediately think of all the new adventures and new memories you guys are going to make in your new place. Letting go of the past can be a challenge sometimes, but in the long run, the benefits are well worth the struggle to just “let go”. When we get rid of the extra baggage holding us back we are able to open up a whole new world of possibilities. I’m excited for you and Terri. Keep us posted on the progress of the move…and pictures of the new place would be fun too!
Krista
.-= Krista Abbott´s last blog ..Social Media Management Tools: HootSuite =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 10th, 2010 at 7:27 pm
Thanks Krista,
Your comments are right on target. The funny thing is though as we get closer to the move I’m seeing us in the house and relaxing and working and just loving our life. I think this is going to be GOOD!
Pictures may one day be in order. After all the house is cute and built in 1893. Terri is very creative.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
[Reply]
I’ll have to make sure your neice reads this!!!
She’s anticipating moving AGAIN and the “starting over” fears are cropping up.
Wish we were closer to help each other with the moves.
Love ya, Barb
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 7:43 am
I know you love San Diego. Come on down. We can fun just like the last time you helped me move…only one cat this time
[Reply]
Hey Don, having just moved myself, I can totally relate to this post. Yes making a physical move has many similarities to moving on emotionally. Evaluating what is valuable and necessary to keep, getting rid of the clutter, and proceeding forward to a new beginning. Good luck with your move and thanks for this wonderful post reminding us all to head into the future without being weighed down dragging the baggage of the past with us.
.-= Kara Grabenhorst´s last blog ..What Kind of Ride Are YOU On? =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 16th, 2010 at 9:03 am
Hi Kara,
I’m glad that you took a minute to share your thoughts on my post. The move went really well but it looks like we still need to let more stuff go. When you downsize it’s hard to know what you’ll keep and what you can let go of. Found more stuff to let go of.
[Reply]
Hey Don!
First off, congrats on the move! I hope it is to your dream house! Second.. congrats on not being single anymore and staying that way for 2 years in.
I can so relate to your post. I have had one of those lives…. I can write a laundry list of reasons why my life is so messed up and poor me yada yada. I used to revel in them all. I mean swim in them, eat them, sleep them, breathe them. They WERE who I was.
Then I gave my life to Jesus. That was the beginning of understanding it isn`t who I was, just what happened to me. Learning who I am and how He sees me has been a huge step in overcoming my circumstances..
Then I met my best friend int eh world. He introduced me to Landmark Eductaion.(www.landmarkeductaion.com). The seminars I attended and the conversations we had changed my life even more.
I can now put my past in my past and live in the present. Hints of it… my past…try to creep back in now and then, but I have come to the place where I can thank it for sharing and go on about my business!
Thanks for this post and good luck with your move!
Live a Juicy Life,
Susan
.-= Susan Davis´s last blog ..30 Day Free Trial Approach to Goal Setting =-.
[Reply]
Don Reply:
March 16th, 2010 at 9:06 am
hi Susan,
I’m glad you found so things in my post that resonate with you and your experiences. We all have a chosen path to walk, sometimes it just takes awhile to find it. Glad you found yours.
[Reply]
Hi Don, great stuff! Sometimes it is very difficult to let go of our material things.
Take care my friend. Douglas
Sorry for the passing of your father in law.
[Reply]
Thanks Jen,
Sometimes you never now how your old baggage will leave. Sorry to hear yours was stolen from you but I guess in the big scheme of things is was meant to be. We moved a little further north. We have a historic home built in 1893 in Old Escondido. We’re having fun getting settled in.
[Reply]